Testimony: glory and praise to God

On Thursday the 25th November after going to church to help with cleaning I waited around and left to goto North City church because I had heard from my friend Peter that Jason Westerfield was conducting meetings at said church and evangelizing in the city during the day times. So because my whole point in being in Christchurch was for God's purposes the thought occured to me to join in with them and see what happens. I rocked up to the church at about 12:30 (prayer meeting went later than expected) and lo and behold they were having worship time. That is good news. Wesley was on the mic praying and so were many others (just not on the mic) I sat down with my bag and started praying also thanking God for how amazing He is, how beautiful, wonderful, I love you. I wouldn't have really expected them to be worshipping so that they were before evangelizing is good. When we had prayed and met with God we piled in cars and I asked "has anyone done this before" everyone in my car had never done it before! God uses anyone it doesn't matter who.

I was paralyzed with fear, that kind that stops you from saying anything or even responding when someone talks to you. So when they asked "are you afraid" I said yes and they prayed for me. I only mention this part because people need to know what is happening. There was a girl who had a broken leg that the power of God healed, and also someone whom was delivered of demons. Oh right! While in the food court we prayed for an elderly couple one had a walking stick and prayed for them. God hears prayers. God is so good! We were just there and God showed up and it all happened, this all happened! it's not something we are waiting for to happen. It has happened!

With thoughts of evangelism fluttering through my mind I went to get some fries and came back for the evening meeting at 6:30 though it didn't start until the speaker arrived. The reason we goto these places isn't because of the speaker, it's because of God and His glory. This impression of what God is doing in our midst is catastrophic. I can give you a summary of what he was speaking about.

1. Don't go back to God and complain to Him because we were too afraid to do what He asks, rather let it be that you are angry with the enemy for getting in your face and convincing you or lying to you, killing you.
2. What we have in us is disastrous to our enemy - we have all the power and authority of Jesus.
3. When we are battling with thoughts of fear, remind the enemy of who we are! We are His child! We are beloved of God
4. The enemy is an image thiever. He takes from us the image that we have before God and says we are not that. And betrays to us the Image of God which He is. And then he stands aside and says "it was Him! it was Him!" and so he gets off scotch free and we are left taking the blame!
5. he is not merciful, he is not your friend, he is out to sabotage and kill you. And does not apologize for it, this is who He is.
6. His master strategy is this "I will Kill you" but we can't die if we have eternal life! It says in the word: "He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." (John 12:25) You can't die if you have been given eternal life!
7. Use the authority that has been given you! Heal the sick and He will bring healing power, Deliver demons and He will bring deliverance! raise the dead and He will bring resurrection power!

I came back home and started praying. Set free of what people could do to me and with an eagerness to see God move in power I asked that He would fill me with His love. And bring maturity to my love for Him which is what I need to go and share Jesus with others. (they had said, I go out and share God's love with others, because they need His love)

Though I didn't end up going to the next service the next day (nor eat... hah just because I fast on fridays) God provided so that I could text someone saying I would not be coming because I had a burden to pray.

I remember thinking as I was at the after wedding lunch of my cousin that I so could stand up and challenge people by saying that God is real. Then I had been quite afraid, though I knew that this could be done, how does God see such an ordeal. Well the answer comes later in the night. After having a ride back from Leithfield to Oxford and being so full that I could not eat, remember thinking that I need to email some people and decide what I was going to do to raise support for finances and the glory of God. Because I know from certain places the chief end of man is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever, this is one purpose not two. And I was wrestling because I knew this. But then a light bulb went on in my head and I realized that If I enjoyed going out and raising finances it was glorifying God, that the two purposes were one, because it's not the action that I'm doing but my attitude towards it that counts. Also a scripture which I had put to the back of my mind instantly was brought to memory:

Her heads judge for a bribe, Her priests teach for pay, And her prophets divine for money. Yet they lean on the LORD, and say, "Is not the LORD among us? No harm can come upon us." (Micah 3:11)

That I never want to charge for the things that I do. I'm going to give away everything that I produce for free. But I will be supported by those who know me. (Nehemiah 13:11)

In fact it is so much more than financial support. If the pursuit of the Glory of God is the whole reason to do anything and go anywhere, then that means God has a special stake in all that I will do. If I do His will He will provide the way. (John 5:30) The more that I enjoy doing His work, and enjoy Him, the more than He is glorified, and the more that He is going to pour on me because I am in a good place for Him. It's not me that is offended, but it's my Father in Heaven. If that's the whole purpose then what will stop me from doing anything for Him? If the enjoyment is all that He is asking for, then he can do the rest!

I began to think just about these things. The thing I love about myself is that I don't doubt what He is doing but I enjoy Him. And share with others, and let them in on what He has revealed to me. And that's what I did. Now I want to share this with anyone! what? that If you enjoy God then He is glorified and He does things, but He started it. And you can't start it, He has to, which means that you are dependent on Him. This is what happened and the person I talked to is the person that someone had prophesied would speak about this very thing to Him and I still haven't asked for what it was that was shared because I am so caught up in this whole thing and that's the honesty of it. I never want to leave this sensation. and I never have to. I wasn't made to think about it, I was made to be obedient and which is trust and loving Him.

Thank You God for making it all about You. Because I have a struggle within myself because it doesn't have to be any where, any place, it can happen right now! And God's glory fell down and I had to be on my knees crying out for His glory and revival. And that's what I did, right there right then. And people were around me and it was outside, and some people were getting hair cuts. People asked what should we do and i said we need to go out and evangelize, i'm going out, who is going to come with me? then i shared that with everyone and we went up to pray and after a while, we knew it was time to go because we weren't ready. And Some of the things people were doing was, waiting for a movie, or thinking of reading the bible, or being bored, and agreed that it was a silly thing, when we could be going out and evangelizing, and why would we do any of those other things when we could do that? And we easily forget these things, maybe we are afraid of people.

I went out evangelizing, not because I want to, but because I was being led by the Holy Spirit. And while I was walking I said to others "I don't know what i am doing" what I said was "I'm listening to the Holy Spirit" and communicating what He has said. Each experience is different, but each one has this hall mark, that if I'm not doing it because I want to, then it's always been about the Holy Spirit leading me and the group, all I'm doing is asking "Holy Spirit, what are you saying"

And that means that I am not more qualified or less qualified for this! what makes me qualified is because I allow the Holy Spirit to move. I allow Him to take control, I allow what better part of me to humble and say "I am not doing this because I want to, but because I am being led by the Holy Spirit, and I'm listening to the Holy Spirit" We're all in the same boat, just because I've had more experiences doesn't make me more qualified. And certainly doesn't make me better than another, if it's just willingness, and the Holy Spirit is the leader, then I can't take the credit for it! So I was so excited during the evening! so much that when I came home I couldn't get to sleep because I was so excited. That's when I decided I had to share this at church tomorrow, it had to happen!

When we left to go out for the night we saw two girls approaching, and some people said "we should goto them" then we saw that it was Malori and Laurie coming the opposite direction. When I caught up to them I said "You're coming with us!" and "Lets pray for you" It was the perfect timing. This happened alot this night - Kids, parents, houses, police, we happened to show up at just the time.

The next day going to church, trembling as I sat down, spoke to the Pastor of Oxford Baptist about what happened the previous night and it lined up with what the service was about - talk about amazing. God's people working like God's people in God's way. This would continue during the week on profound levels. So while I shared about how anybody could go out and do this, because it was not about me, but it was about God's glory! I was trying to give all the glory to God.

The sermon was going along as planned and then it was like she didn't need to say anything, she didn't buy or sell the message of evangelism, just said "the people that are getting spoken to by the Holy Spirit come up front to get impartation" so I went forward because the Holy Spirit was speaking to me and not after long the Holy Spirit was coming in power and people were falling down and getting impartation. This seems to happen everywhere the Holy Spirit goes, He must be very excited, enjoyable and funny person! because it happens the same way everywhere!

This wasn't a coincidence. What was happening was impartation and I was asked "just receive" so I stood there and then it all happened (i had been speaking to God up until now) getting power so that I could walk in this impartation, which is to love others like I love God, which is what I want. And hit the nail on the head!

The whole experience is a hallmark declaration from the Holy Spirit, the history of this year has been walking with the Holy Spirit and He's more interested in my attitude and conscience than He is in what I do (you can't seperate the two) After receiving the word from God that He would provide for me to support me, it took 11 months, and in that space I have had to give up everything I had, rely on peoples kindness, fears on the inside (which did not say "Did I hear from God" but God didn't say that!) and on the outside saying "God didn't say that!"

I had pre-determined to fast on Tuesday, and it happened that it was the day when I would seek God for wisdom and council about making the decision in dealing with finances, but with the pressure gone, I know the important thing is to give away everything that I produce to people for free and God will do the rest. Solomon asked the same question! He asked for Wisdom! God's people working in God's way achieving God's purposes! So all I heard from Him that day was "Just Receive" I would go up to the prayer room, come down, talk with a person, go up to prayer, come down talk to a person. This is why I wanted to share with people, and it just so happened everyone I talked to was the correct person, and it always worked out perfectly. I knew and still know that I can never add to or take away from the testimony "I'm not doing it because I want to, but the Holy Spirit is leading me, and I listen to what the Holy Spirit says" you can never add to or take away from that. But I remembered a few days ago that I had said "I have given up everything to be supported by God, because God my Father himself wants to support me and take care of me, and that He wants to replace the things that I trusted in before" what a freeing feeling!

Kairos time - Where it's not that you wait for what God is doing, but that God does something and you ask the question. "Now what did He do?" And it's not derogatory, because He walks with you in it as well. This is my experience. All my life I've been searching for this freeing feeling and now I have it because it's not about what I've done - It's about being led by the Holy spirit! And if I enjoy it, He empowers me! That is the crux of evangelism and world missions. The glory of God (This actually brings back to me the importance of having such a radically altered conscience, and about how our balance is really reliant on the Holy Spirit, which is a lesson I learnt while snowboarding! It was just a few months ago which I shared! going to Porters)