YWAM Update: Backwards Forwards

Hey there, for another update, from Oxford! (though I'm in Christchurch at the moment, visiting my parents!) I am super excited at the moment though I feel like every step I take I take two backwards. I have really been struggling for the life of me to be victorious over my addiction to video games. If you would like to share in this with me, contact me and I would love to be more honest and open about it. Well, maybe the best way to put it is, I am honest and open about it, but part of victory is confessing to another our faults and allowing the Holy Spirit to not only be victorious, but Ignite in my heart and show God superior to everything. It is an interesting thing to be struggling with. For God takes the steps that I don't. In Song of Songs it says:

"I will ascend the Mountain of Myyrh
i will ascend the hill of frankincense"

It is referring to the small amount of effort it takes for us in prayer, to gain great efforts. Myrrh refers to suffering, frankincense to prayer, so a Mountain being large means there is lots of suffering, but God in his providence only asks a little amount of us. This is a bit like how I am feeling. If you don't believe me then ask my Lord! If you ask Him all he'll say is "I am being myself around Him" - I very much need the help of Him at this time. So whether I stumble or trip up or walk along it's all by providence. My prayers don't add or take away from what God does, If I were to pray all day it would add nothing to my testimony. For prayer is weakness, I am confessing I need Him for my daily bread. But my prayers are heard. So when my prayers are heard, then things happen. But I can't take the credit for it!

So it has made me think alot about the past year, how God has brought me, how he has taught me, what has happened on base, which means, I am going to be having another opportunity for people to hear God's work and what I've done this past year, in a share night! anyone welcome! Watch this space for updates!

I do feel like I'm making progress. In Proverbs it says
"Trust in the Lord (Love Him and wait upon Him)
and lean not on your own understanding (turn from human wisdom and what your heart says)
in all your ways acknowledge Him
and He will direct your paths (He will be in the midst of you, leading you in victory)"

Love Him and the consequences will pan out. I mean, what kind of love is this, that my weaknesses become my strengths, my failures become joy, the Lord does this because He loves me. It has to go further, it has to be love that is demonstrated in Loving Him. It can't just be something that we keep on the inside. This is only rational, after thinking about how He has made everything. (He is also made everything - in Lordship over us)

I pray that you are led into a relationship with God that turns the inside of you to freedom, and that love returns to the only worthy God