Photos of Springtime

Capturing my budding interest of photography, I have been taking some nice shots of Springtime here in the Garden City. If you would like to take a look, click the Link below to take a journey into my life in the last few weeks (or months) Here ya go!

Photos While in Hospital

Spring Showdown

Hello everyone,

Many of you will be asking "where has Nathan gone? we have not heard from him for such a long time" I would like to assure you, that I am still going strong for God, and in fact, finding my prayers answered especially recently, in regard to my family, and friends, and being able to relate to people (many may not know, but I have difficulties in communicating socially, this is something I struggle with regularly)

I am wanting to communicate that I have been in hospital for the last 3 months, first in a place called Pipiri Ward at Hillmorton Hospital, followed by a move to Takahe Ward, and then transferred to Princess Margaret Hospital at a Clinic called Seager. This is where the photos in this post are coming from.

But first off I want to share something that has been on my heart since the beginning of being here. "The Kingdom of Heaven is NOW" We are being confronted by the reality of Jesus return to earth. How can i say this? It is because He has spoken it to me. Afterall, there is a scripture being fulfilled in our very day.

"The Spirit of the Lord GOD [is] upon Me,
Because the LORD has anointed Me
To preach good tidings to the poor;
He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives,
And the opening of the prison to [those who are] bound;
To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD,
And the day of vengeance of our God;
To comfort all who mourn,
To console those who mourn in Zion,
To give them beauty for ashes,
The oil of joy for mourning,
The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;
 That they may be called trees of righteousness,
 The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified."

This is a declaration of faith, as much as it is the most important thing in my life right now. I can witness to this. On the day I came to Hospital, was the day that I was diagnosed with psychosis. I want you to know, yes! I want you to be apart of what has been happening to me. It occurs to me, that I have been very unwell, and that I was putting connections in my thoughts that were not there. Let me clarify what I am saying here. In my thoughts I could not put ordinary things together, my thinking was very jumbled in my head. It became very hard for me to tell if I was hearing from God, or if I was just thinking in overdrive. I have been rescued from my own thinking. This has happened rather quickly, and I thank the Lord that it has been the way it has, I also find myself far more excited to conduct normal hobbies and things (I have taken up photography)

If you want to pray for me, I am very much appreciated of this. I want you to know what has been happening for me, so that you can pray more specifically. My goal is to be able to get back into my life as soon as february next year. I also want you to know that I have a possibility of a flat coming up soon, which will be in Barbadoes St in Christchurch. The first photo is Steve Spillane's. I have taken the photos on a Samsung WB150F camera

Brokenness and Leadership

I came to the airport, because while worshipping this morning, I had been stopped! and fear fell on me, to listen! All of a sudden, this picture of Memorial Ave and Graham's Rd came into view. I knew it to be a bus route. "I will catch a bus to the airport" I said

I just want to let you know, the travels today, of my journey with Father and Son

I do know that they do not lead me amiss.

This just comes vividly clear as I think about it now

I came to the airport and thought about what I should do, and met my friend Steve, sitting just inside the doorway. I shared the story of receiving a picture, and coming here, believing it to be from Him

This is why, I can currently recall the events, without getting emotional

I was a little afraid as I sat down in the arrivals lounge, thinking about this one thing, being in Israel. God and I had a conversation together about what it would take to get on board an aeroplane, when I realized "If they have a ticket booked for me, it ought to be on the systems" so I decided to head on over to Emirates, where I handed my passport to them, made a search for today, and tomorrow, and found out that there was no booking for me on this passport.

It was a bit harder than the way that I put it, because I hadn't made a booking, I didn't have a travel agent, and I didn't have someone else, that booked the flight for me. I was going off God and His booking me on a flight

I went back to sit down in the arrival lounge, (a place I came back to alot) and thought about what had happened, and then made the connection between what God had showed me and my now present circumstance. I saw a courtroom scene, with Jesus as King, preciding over the plaintaints

declaring "No one who says this will not happen will stand" - that He was bringing justice to this purpose

God's word, his authority, and his ability will stand, everything he does, no one knows, who knows what He is about to do?

Here stood in parallel to this scene what I now had facing before me - simply to walk up to the counter, say

"I have a booking with God by prayer
I know about authority and that His booking would be on your system if He had made a booking
I know that he opens doors that no one can shut"

So I did not

I recognise that I'm not ready - in two ways, my love, and conviction of His authority.

God do what you are doing, I am walking with you

There is going to be a wedding

Thinking about the gesture that God will do because He loves me, to show His love to me, at first humbles me, But then I think about the fact that it's totally unearned. It must be that the JOY of the Bride, is only met on her wedding day.

This comes from thinking about how much money must be paid to get to Jerusalem. If i'm honest, it puts me through the same feelings that I think of Jesus, because how am I to know exactly the love that He has shown to me, the blood that He was spilled for me? Am I not in this continual debt? Does this not put me through the feelings once again of what love He has shown to me? It is just money, but in the way that God does, he is putting it into my mind, and in my heart.

There's not so much I can say! This love is whole-hearted, it demands all of me, wrestles my affections away from temporary pleasures, and keeps fear in my heart towards other lovers. It is righteous Love, that removes everything that hinders love for the sake of love. It is jealous Love, bearing the name of God, remains, when the controversy has ended, and the last enemies dealt with. Abandon's my heart to service, knowing that there is a reward, and that to miss out on what He has for me, would be terrifying. This is a love that takes all other options away, promises all that He has to offer, filled by confidence energized by the Spirit.

waits, sustains, refreshes, he has become everything 

He has shown me another analogy of how we are to see life.

The Bride, being escorted through the wilderness

With Her Bridegroom

Why does He wrestle with our hearts in the wilderness? Why does he take from us the names of the Baals in the wilderness? Is it not because our hearts are unfaithful to Him? Isn't it because He is jealous for all of us? the wilderness is not the point of it!

Wilderness is never the point of it!

That would be like the Israelite people, being slain with thirst.

He has shown us the way through - Himself is the only one who has been through! The only one victorious

I'm poking now, but I have to, because people are saying, "Why don't you just stay here for a season?"

We have a Bridegroom who is jealous for us, because He loves us. To be concerned with anyone else is just not reality, and it is not biblical either (if anyone was thinking that way)

What is now the outcome and point of wilderness is Himself. When I find Him, I have found everything! When I get to Jerusalem I get everything!

What connection am I making here?

I have no other plans, only to be with Jesus. He spoke this because my own wilderness is very testing, and very trying. if I were to focus on the temporary, and the things that are before me - financial obligations, schools coming and going out, my own friendships! even! I would loose my heart, and I would be distressed, and without peace. This is exactly what happens. It's not an IF, but a consequence of being human. It's because He made us to be totally His. It is because He is God.

I understand! Hallelujah! Come marry me in Jerusalem, Jesus!

The wedding is something else! beyond comparison! It is where He is leading you!

Being chosen for a People Group

There are two things that are being repeated over me today.

The first is "be a little child" - this is the easy part

The second is a thing Art Katz said. "The place he will call you is the place that He has pre-eminently chosen for You"

It was a phrase used when describing the leading of the Holy Spirit, in Acts 16:6-10

Now when they had gone throughout Phrygia and the region of Galatia, and were forbidden of the Holy Ghost to preach the word in Asia, After they were come to Mysia, they assayed to go into Bithynia: but the Spirit suffered them not. And they passing by Mysia came down to Troas. And a vision appeared to Paul in the night; There stood a man of Macedonia, and prayed him, saying, Come over into Macedonia, and help us. And after he had seen the vision, immediately we endeavoured to go into Macedonia, assuredly gathering that the Lord had called us for to preach the gospel unto them.

It has been a bit of a "yes, no" season for me, with Gods leading.

I do not mean God changed His mind! Ask my leaders at YWAM

It has literally been, a yes, yes, yes, NO door, where I have been leaping through doors and saying "this is where I'm going" to find it abruptly shut.

I am trembling as I write this, of the implications of today.

In a way, my ability to write this out, has been cut short, too. And sometimes you do not need to have the words all together sometimes.

What is on my heart is in connection with this "harvest out" by which the Holy Spirit gloriously leads. I kind of feel honoured, to be spoken to with such instructions, by the Holy Spirit himself. But there is something that I have to say: Do not look at me! What is happening is far bigger than myself!

Look in me being chosen for a people group. The enormity of that statement, and the glorious wisdom by which God is making this happen.

I will try to be succint when I say this.

It has to do with LOVE. When I am looking back 10 years from now, it will not be the things that I have done - but because of God's heart - for my people. What I mean is, showing up at a soup kitchen, and told "put on an apron and start serving" - or being asked to lead the youth program. Knowing in that moment, "I am here, and I'm doing this for one man, and He is worth it"

The crazy thing is, NO ONE go, unless you are chosen for a people group. Where did this choosing come from? If you have read the last few entries, I will be succint, It is because He said "I am pursuing YOU with my love" - I want your love. It is because, His purpose, is THE purpose. All I want is to be able to say to others the great things that God is doing IN ME, and that is exactly WHAT IS happening. My joy, is actually connected with the reality, that I am the Bride, and that my JOY being that others are hearing about that, in whatever way, is actually reminding me of my relationship with Him.

The question that is on everyone's mouth "When are you going?" is made irrelevant, not because it is not important, but the day is set already, August 2nd!

It's made irrelevant, because You just got to look inside me and hear my heart to know that He will do what He has promised. Is it really so hard to believe that God knows the journey that I'm on? that He knows the future? is that impossible for Him? I do not even have choices anymore, I have the heart of Jesus.  And He is the one fuelling me to be in Jerusalem for my wedding.

I want to be succint with the last part, that God the Father is incarnating me into a people group, he is birthing me into a people group, and this is two-fold: That it is a complete immersion, no longer alive. That it is instantaneous, it will happen, just like that

This is like it says in Psalm 2, where it says "Ask of me, and I will give the nations to you" - it is referring to Jesus, but there is a flooding that is happening in the church right now, Sons walking in their inheritance

The part that is hard to say, and which has left unsaid is the most important part. But I have no words for this part. See Him as the glue which holds everything together. My JOY is only fulfilled on the day that He marries me.

While I was lead along today, I bought a pair of boardshorts! Go Jesus! in fact, I got them on special, for under half price! He was using the experience to show me that I am being stretched out of my comfort zone, I do not even know what they are used for! How do you use them!